Family Work

This is one of the only photos my family has to help us remember the two summers when we grew an acre and a half of watermelon, cantaloupe, and pumpkins. Growing and selling watermelons was something my dad did when he was younger, so when he felt like us kids were old enough to handle a big project like that he helped us get started.

The land that we gardened on was practically right next to our house, so everyday we'd either walk or ride our bikes over to the field and work. During planting season we prepared the rows by setting up drip lines for watering and then rolling out black plastic (to help prevent weeds) over the drip lines. Then we would go down each row, cut holes in the plastic, and plant the seeds by hand. When it came time to harvest we would set up a little table and sun shade by the side of the road and sell the melons.

Even though it was a project intended for just the 4 oldest kids the whole family ended up helping out in one way or another. Those two summers were filled with lots of hard work and fun memories and for that I'm very grateful. Gardening on a large scale like that with my siblings can be considered as "family work". According to Bahr and Loveless, the authors of Family Work and Housework: The Chores that Bind Us, family work is "the everyday, ordinary, hands-on labor of sustaining life that cannot be ignored—feeding one another, clothing one another, cleaning and beautifying ourselves and our surroundings." In recent years, especially with a rise in feminism, society has been saying that family work is "the province of the exploited and powerless". No one wants to do the mundane tasks. They aren't fun. Women, who have traditionally been homemakers and nurturers, are now feeling the desire to get out and work just like the men. This social trend, no matter how empowering it might be, is adversely affecting familial relationships.

What might be more important than economic benefits of family work is the potential to strengthen family ties, build character, and serve communities. As I mentioned before, family work is basically just regular chores around the house. Chores are never something I enjoy doing. When I lived at home, Saturday was the day we did deep-cleaning. My least favorite Saturday chore was mopping the floors. My mom always had us do it with a rag on our hands and knees and I never understood why we didn't just buy one of those fancy Swiffer mops. Anyway, my point in talking about mopping floors and the watermelon field is that yes, chores can sometimes feel like the bane of our existence, but they can also be a great opportunity for family bonding that we can't get anywhere else.

That watermelon field was the source of quite a few inside jokes that we occasionally reference to this day. Also, one of my favorite memories is singing along to the "cool" songs my older siblings listened to as we laid down plastic. Additionally, taking on the responsibilities associated with running a road-side melon stand helped us learn good work ethic and strengthened our trust and respect in one another.

Some people may acknowledge the benefits of family work but feel unable to provide those types of experiences for their family since both parents need to work in order to bring in enough money to live comfortably. I'd like to suggest that in a lot of cases, having both parents work isn't actually worth it. When both husband and wife have jobs that take them outside the home, expenses inevitably go up. Therefore, the two-income paycheck doesn't accurately reflect the time and effort that both parents are putting in at their jobs. While some argue that homemaking is a waste of a college education or that women are "swapping their minds for a mop" I'd say that their opinion is extremely close-minded. When a parent, traditionally the mom, can stay home with the children and take care of things in the house and in the yard they are making perhaps a greater and far more valuable impact on their kids and their community than they would if they went to work. Not to mention, it's basically a woman's calling to be a mother and raise children, not a hobby.

I realize that this post on family work turned into a somewhat controversial discussion on motherhood and homemaking. While this can be a sensitive thing to talk about, I believe it's important to understand the benefits of doing the mundane household chores as a family and the important roles that fathers and mothers play in a family.